A Not-So-Straight Circle

He told me, “Life is funny like that.”
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I had this brief brush with a thought today: What if this is our purgatory, now, in this state of what we call “living?” I thought that because I realized one important notion about life-

It’s cyclical.

Nothing stays the same, nothing is static, things- EVERY THING- gets altered and bended and broken but then…then things get fixed, they fall back together, in pieces, but they do. They get mended, and start working again.

~

I have always divided my life into segments, time periods, phases. I feel like certain years represent a lifetime ago, and with that era holds a whole different version of this person who has my smile and my name; it’s a life belonging to the same person but in such a different way.

I don’t know, maybe I’m not making myself clear, but I guess my point is this: as long as we’re here, in this realm, nothing is final. And it took me so long to realize that, or to trust in that. I think we are in this state- a living purgatory- presented with similar types of people and problems, paradoxes and places until we get it right.

Or maybe there is no right. Maybe there is no definitive point, no right place to start or finish, and perhaps that’s OK because there is no concrete beginning or end. I don’t remember when my life began, not a clue. Not the day, not even the first few years. And I have no idea when it’s going to cease and stop being in motion, not when or where or how. But I do know this- I do know now. I know that wheels are working, turning together, keeping my life in motion; cyclical, in the cycle of a circle.

~

I realize my thoughts are scattered; I’m thinking and typing in a not-so-straight circle. But I’ve experienced enough thus far in my time here to know that there’s a force out there, whether you want to label it “God”, “Jesus”, the Cosmos, Love, Time, Fate- whatever your preference- that allows us to have second and third chances. That gives us closure, that lets us redeem ourselves, to forgive and to be forgiven. I know that feeling of dejavu, of meeting someone and feeling an extraordinary connection, of feeling like this isn’t the first time here. When I experience those situations, it clicks, even for just a couple of seconds.

~

Oxymorons like the “predictable unpredictability”, or how “the only thing constant in life is change” exist, because Life is Funny Like That.

KV ©

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